Friday, July 23, 2010 by Dea.

Today is hot.  And humid.  So was yesterday, for that matter.  Yesterday we (we being me and the kids) went to the county fair and I’m proud of us for that.  We could have just said forget it, and seen a movie.  Keeping active despite the weather is hard, but doable.

Today we were supposed to hang out with Becca , go for a nice hike and have a picnic.  But with temps in the upper 90’s, she and I decided we’d rather not have any cases of heat stroke on our hands.  So we filled up a bunch of water balloons and super soakers and waged a battle with the kids.  It was tons of fun, we were active, and we cooled off.  Yeah, it’s not hitting the gym.  But it’s a lot better than sitting on our butts, like we could have done.

So no excuses!  Find a way to stay active and cool at the same time.  We wound up having an awesome time doing it.

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Tuesday, October 27, 2009 by Dea.

Some days, I feel like I’m at war.  I’m fighting against advertising, societal pressure, and my own errant brain to try to live the healthiest life possible and lose weight.  I get anxious when I have to drive a certain route because I know the myriad restaurants I’ll see, and smell, as I go along.  And I know that the temptation can be overwhelming.

I’m a person who, once the idea of a food gets in my head, obsesses.  I think many times an hour about that food.  It’s frustrating, because there’s only so much of that obsessing I can ignore.  If I could get my brain to just shaddup, I might be strong enough to ignore the commercials and the smells.

It’s a big commitment to get on a healthy track.  It’s a lot of work to change the way you look at food.  I often get frustrated that I can’t see results right away.  It’s not a war fought through battles with obvious wins, and you don’t get medals.  Each small victory isn’t noticeable to other people.   Or even noticeable on the scale, in the mirror, or in your jeans.

Every small victory, though, is beneficial.  Frustration is something we all face, but we can’t let it get the best of us.  Whenever we’re upset because our hard work isn’t showing yet, we need to remind ourselves of where we started, what we’ve accomplished, and how each of our good choices and healthy changes adds up to move us along our march toward better health.

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Wednesday, September 16, 2009 by Dea.

What’s the number one, best reason to have a home gym?  No, it’s not being able to work out whenever you want.  It’s being able to work out wearing whatever, even just your sport bra and bike shorts.  If I wore just that to my old gym, as some women there actually do, there would have been mass hysteria and riots.  People would have rushed towards me with towels to cover all my glaring white flesh.

At home, though, no one cares what I look like.  I’m not roasting when I’m on the spin bike because the only shirt that I felt comfortable wearing in public is two sizes too big and the sleeves go past my elbows.  I can pin back my hair at absurd angles, worrying only about comfort, and not how I look.

I had forgotten how absolutely wonderful it was to just do 20-30 minutes of exercise when I feel like it.  I always felt like I needed to put in 2 hours at the gym because of the stress and difficulty in getting two children and myself ready and out the door and through the 20+ minute drive.  Now, I can just hop on my bike for 6 songs, do some crunches, and leave.  I can go back later to do squats and push-ups.

It is so completely freeing.  I was so self conscious at the gym.  I felt like people were looking at me funny, or pitying me.  I actually had one woman in a spin class that I took regularly, where she was the new person, turn to me and ask me if this was my first spin class.  I was aghast!  I’ve done spin since my 5 year old was born, and had done it regularly at least once a week for a  year and a half at that point.  She assumed that because I was heavy, I was out of shape.  After that day, I felt even less comfortable at that gym.

I love my home gym so much, I don’t even miss my office.  I’m happily sharing an office with my husband.  I can’t wait to try out the Pilates book I found.  I’d always been too intimidated to go to a Pilates class because of how tiny and lean the women who went were.  I do miss my Wednesday night spin class (taught by a good friend of mine) - but other than that, I am just so happy to be free and comfortable in my work outs again.

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Thursday, September 10, 2009 by Dea.

So, in case anyone was doubting the power of the mini-goal (read: me), here’s proof that each mini-goal achievement is priceless!  I just hit my 10 pound goal!  I also feel like a million bucks. 

I set ten pound goals as I lose weight.  I like nice, round numbers, for one thing.  And this feeling, this exuberance and walking-on-air, this is the best reason of all for setting mini-goals.  

I may only be 1/7 th of my way through my weight loss, and I may still have 60 pounds to lose, but reaching this goal makes me feel like I’ve conquered something.  I feel like I look better in my clothes than I did yesterday.  I feel more energetic.  I feel, in short, fabulous.

So here’s to setting those mini-goals.  You’ll be glad you did when you get to have this mini-celebration!

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Tuesday, August 25, 2009 by Dea.

I was having a really rough day.  I sent off my son, my last baby, to Kindergarten without me today.  I also went to Target looking for a bathing suit.  Needless to say, I was feeling really, really bad about myself.  Big, used up, and without purpose are a few things I was thinking.

Then I saw this article.   And I am smiling, and just feeling on top of the world.  I love Lizzi Miller.  She is a supposed plus-size (she’s a size 12, which in my book is an average sized woman, right?) model, and at the age of 20, she’s found such a wonderful mental space.  She is an example of loving yourself being the best state of mind for a healthy life.

She posed in just underwear - with her belly bulge showing.  No airbrushing, no smoothing out her stretch marks.  And she talks about how seeing other women like herself on tv and in magazines has helped her body image.  She’s right.  Seeing her there, looking so normal, so achievable even, helped me to put my own body into different perspective.  I think I might print her picture and keep it for any time I’m bashing myself.

Amazingly, unlike Self, Glamour chose to couple an article about positive body image no matter your size with a picture of a real woman - without airbrushing.  Kudos to them for this monumental step.  Pictures with the words are so much more forceful.  Hopefully, they realize from the outpouring of positive emails and letters that this is how we want to see all the pages in the magazine.

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Friday, August 21, 2009 by Becca.

Sometimes being heavier is easier.  It’s hard when shopping for clothes or trying to ride any form of public transportation without becoming extra friendly with the person next to you, but it’s easy sometimes too.  At least, it’s been easy for me in the past.  It’s been very easy to tell myself that I don’t care how heavy I am.  I could tell myself I wasn’t concerned with appearances and that I wasn’t interested in other people’s opinions of how I look.

All of which is true, sort of, on my good days.  What shook me out of my nice little cocoon of denial was my health.  I’ve had some health problems that I would not have at such a young age if I took better care of myself.  So I’ve made changes in my lifestyle and slowly I’m losing weight and getting more fit.

I miss that denial though, more than I miss greasy double cheeseburgers or giant chocolate cupcakes with frosting and sprinkles.  It’s hard to look in the mirror everyday and see someone who’s working on bettering her body, hard to give up the security of that bigger sense of self.  I need to remind myself why I started this whole process.

Of course it’s hard, of course there’s a struggle and obstacles to overcome.  In my experience, the easy things in life are rarely as rewarding as the hard ones!

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Tuesday, August 18, 2009 by Dea.

We are all unique, like snowflakes.  So why is it we assume that one weight loss plan will work for everyone?

What works for me is to restrict my portions, rather than any one food group.  I’ve tried going the restriction route.  It does not work for me.  I wind up torturing myself by withholding something like, say, carbs, and then going off the deep end a week later, rolling naked in a pile of Snickers bars.  Ok, maybe not naked, we own quite a few mirrors, but you get the point.  I know I just can’t live like that. 

I respect that carb cutting is ideal for other people.  If something doesn’t work for me, I can’t assume it won’t work for anyone.  Somehow, other people do not offer me the same respect.  I have frequented weight loss boards in the past, and people can get very militant about weight loss programs.  I’ve been called names, had my intelligence questioned, just because I didn’t follow a person’s method of weight loss.

I personally think that whatever you do in a healthy way to get to a better, healthier you, is the right way.  We’re all doing things to improve our quality of life, and if one person finds it easier to cut carbs while another does Weight Watchers, who are any of us to say someone is wrong?  We can all benefit from tips and tricks that work for others.  I’ve incorporated things I learned from other people, even if we aren’t n the same “plan.”  So what is your weight loss identity?

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Monday, August 17, 2009 by Dea.

I think one of the hardest parts of weight loss can be setting reasonable and achievable goals for yourself.  So often good intentions will be wiped out by huge disappointment when a goal that was set too high isn’t reached.  It’s important to avoid high expectations, which often lead to feelings of failure.

One guideline for weight loss goal setting is the 10% rule.  With this rule of thumb, you set your first goal to be losing 10% of your body weight.  For my starting point, that would be 25.3 pounds for my first goal, as my starting weight was 253 pounds.

A goal of 25.3 pounds is a lot less daunting than the full 75 pounds I want to lose.  It is still rather a large number, however.  To avoid feeling like it’s utterly hopeless to lose all the weight I want, I set several types of goals.  The first goal I determine is the total amount I want to lose.  I call this my Long Term Goal.  I want to eventually be 180 pounds.  So this is my Long Term Goal, and that means I have to lose 75 pounds total.  Seeing that large number can create panic, though, so I set my Intermediate Goals.  These are not nearly as large as my Long Term Goal.  For this, I use the 10% rule of thumb.  For other people who have less to lose, this can be a halfway or a third-of-the-way sort of thing.  Anything that divides the Long Term Goal into portions can work well here.

Since I have so much to lose, I find that my Intermediate Goals are still rather large.  I need encouragement and success to keep me going, which I am sure is something that helps any person trying to reach a goal.  So I set my Minor Goals.  These, for me, are 10 pounds.  Each time I lose 10 pounds, I reward myself.  Normally, I buy myself a new top or a pair of jeans.  Reaching an achievement point is a big boost to self esteem.  It can make or break a person’s journey.  This is why setting reasonable goals is so important.

Expecting a body that gained the weight over time to lose it quickly is unhealthy both for your bdy and your mind.  It’s important to maintain a healthy rate of weight loss.  Losing 10 pounds in a week isn’t sustainable weight loss.  And the following week, if you only lose 1 pound, you might feel like a failure and quit.  Which is better - consistently losing 1 to 2 pounds a week, or losing 10 one week and 1 the next then quitting and gaining it back?

So be kind to yourself.  Set several types of goals, small, medium and large.  Reward yourself in different ways each time you reach a goal.  And in regards to time limits, be reasonable and don’t expect more than a 2-pounds-per-week loss.  Remember - a journey of 100 miles is not finished in a short time.  And you must take the first smaller steps in order to get to the finish line.

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Friday, August 14, 2009 by Becca.

Office culture can be hard on a gal who’s trying to live a healthy life!  For one thing, being stuck at a desk most of your day limits the activity you get.  You can counter this by walking to a coworkers office instead of emailing them or hand delivering paperwork instead of using interoffice mail.  One trick I use is to run something to the copier or fax as soon as it’s ready instead of “saving up” a few items to copy or fax.

Another hurdle to overcome at my office is resisting the “goodies”.  Almost every week, there is some type of baked good in our kitchen, which doubles as our copy and fax area, making it impossible for me to keep it out of sight.

I have a few strategies for dealing with this.  I have become the unofficial party planner in our office.  I’m the one who organizes the potlucks and ice cream socials. This works for me because it keeps me busy while everyone is eating at gatherings.  It also gives me the power to insist that people take leftovers home.

I also try to prepare myself if I know there will be a yummy treat nearby.  I try to  have some guilt-free treats of my own on hand.  Sometimes I even prefer these treats to their more fattening counterparts.  One of my favorite treats is berries mixed with fat free sugar free pudding.  Another is fat free cool whip on top of almost anything.  If I really want a piece of that danish on the kitchen counter, though, I just have a piece.  I enjoy it, I don’t beat myself up about my “slip”, and I move on to my next meal.

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Wednesday, August 12, 2009 by Dea.

Women, overall, are very hard on themselves.  We expect perfection from ourselves in anything we do.  Be it at work, at home, or in the gym, we want to achieve everything at 100% success rates.  Is this realistic?  Not really.  But knowing that doesn’t mean we expect it any less.

I know that I will beat myself up for eating fast food, or too much candy.  Is that fair to do to myself?  I’m not sure.  It isn’t a question of whether I want the end result bad enough.  It’s more a question of whether or not I should expect myself to never eat anything that isn’t good for me.  Sometimes, a chocolate bar, or a small french fries, is good for you.

If I expect 100% healthy eating from myself, I set myself up for a huge letdown.  Basically, if I choose one thing “off course” then I might scrap the whole day, and give in to eating all junk, all day.  One small diversion from the path you’ve set out for yourself doesn’t ruin the entire day.  Or week.

It’s about the small victories.  Like when you go out to a restaurant, and choose to put half your order into a box and take it home BEFORE you start eating.  Or when you get up off the couch and go for a walk.  Each small improvement, every single minor change, adds up to a big difference.

So I keep this motto I learned at Jenny Craig foremost in my mind, so that I won’t expect the impossible, and I will celebrate the positive steps I make.  “Progress, not perfection.”  It’s a good thing to remember, because it helps you love every small positive, and let go of any negatives.  The more you celebrate, the healthier you live.

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